THE BIGGER THE DREAM (PHASE 3)

Dear friends, we are still on the subject: THE BIGGER THE DREAM! In our PHASE 1 and 2, we established the fact that with a big dream comes a big reward. However, with the size of your dream comes great responsibilities and commitments. The bigger the dream, the greater the commitments, if you can stay with the commitments, your reward is sure.

Some of the sure responsibilities that accompanies a BIG DREAM includes:
(1). THE DEMANDS - Everything of lasting and incredible value must place a demand on you. Nothing of beauty and sure value comes cheap. Now, what is the major demand of a BIG DREAM?

Preparation. If you have a big dream, you must match it with great preparation; you don't pay a 'local' price for a 'global' vision. I believe preparation is the key to manifestation, every product that ever gets to the showroom must first go through the factory, the production house! When it comes to our personal dreams, the time of preparation is the all-important period when you seek answers relevant to the personal issues connected to the realization of your dream... It is the time of solidifying your assurance, convictions and dissolving doubts.

Preparation is a compulsory phase in your journey to success. There is no substitute to it. The time spent preparing is never a waste. Friend, invest time in getting yourself mentally, spiritually, emotionally and socially set for your dream.

You must establish a development program towards the accomplishment of your dream. You must train yourself. Your personal training is a proof of your commitment to your dream. Do not be deceived by conventional school qualifications or degree accumulation, there is no substitute for personal development. This is what ultimately counts, this is what brings the goods to your hands.

Learn a skill. Develop a deep expertise in an outstanding skill relevant to the fulfillment of your dream. Get a skill for your dream sake. In my view, a failure is just one skill away from success. This further means that a dream is not the only ingredient you need to succeed. Adequate preparation and skill development is what makes for colorful participation. You don’t stroll into success, you don’t sleep into it - you work into it!

Your dream can only develop to the extent that you do. It is the seed that create the fruit, it is what is under-ground that produces what is above the ground. Success is an inside-out thing. You must develop your ‘within’ and grow your capacity. When success comes knocking, let it meet you prepared!

On my next post, we will talk about the Demand #2.
Have a most productive day!

THE BIGGER THE DREAM!

I am a strong believer in the FUTURE of this country. The 'FUTURE' is not just some imagination, vague picture or wish. To me, the 'FUTURE' is a people. Whenever I talk about 'THE FUTURE OF NIGERIA', I am talking about ‘MY GENERATION’. I believe in my generation and the lot we have to offer our country. Irrespective of our horrifying past and challenging present.

It is for this reason I do what I do; inspire, provide direction and guidance to members of my generation to ensure peak performance and all-round successful living...

For the next couple of days (maybe weeks), I will be talking about DREAMS! I will narrow down my focus on the subject: THE BIGGER THE DREAM! This is a excerpt of one of my recent presentations!

There are some basic facts that none of us can argue. One of them is: everything outstanding begins in dream form. It first begins in the 'seed' form before developing or growing into 'food' form. Many people are quick to celebrate the 'food' state, forgetting there was ever a 'seed' form.

What exactly is my point? You cannot succeed in life without a DREAM! A man or woman without a DREAM will die a slave! Wishes are for slaves, DREAMS are for masters, pacesetters and front liners!

Now to the basics! One thing is certain, we didn't all come from same backgrounds. While some of us came from average homes, others came from affluent backgrounds, while some others came from terribly poor backgrounds.

To my mind, your 'background' is your door to planet earth. The quality of your background does not count much. For instance, there are many doors into a beautiful hall, it does not matter much which door you came through into the hall. What matters is that you end up getting into hall and securing a seat in the hall! This is what counts! Friends, destiny doesn’t care much which ‘door’ you came through into this world; you are already here – make impact.

Here is another illustration.
If you put a gold wristwatch into a dirt bin, the dirt-bin does not turn into a wristwatch. Neither does the wristwatch become dirt. The wristwatch may not have increased in value, but the dirt-bin increased in value. Why? It had a gold wristwatch inside it.

What is the lesson? It does not matter which dustbin you were born into, you are created to add value to it. You must add value to your family; you must add value to your nation.

Stop holding unto or complaining because of your background. Do not tie yourself to your past. There is more ahead of you than there is behind you. You can be all you choose to be, irrespective of how you have been.
There is hope for the man that chooses dream, against all odds...

We will talk about the ‘START POINT’ on my next post!

Keep happening!

"Sir, what is the dominant challenge facing the average Nigerian youth?"

Its been a very busy month. Speaking engagements, consulting sessions and lots of faith-based and social activities worthy of my time investment.

Last weekend, I was in Lagos, Nigeria for the DREAM BIG Conference 2009, organized by the 3M International, a vivacious and purpose-driven organization headed by Mr. Kenny olagbenjo. I spoke alongside Pastor Kingsley Okonkwo, Pastor of David Christian Center, situated in Lagos State, Nigeria. Never met the guy until that day, I must confess, the guy's got a head! He's both smart and intelligent. I was informed his church is a fast growing one, not so surprised though.

I had a great time with the folks there, predominantly youths. I spoke on the topic: THE DREAM, THE DREAMR and HIS GOD. It was a big wow!

At the end of the conference, I was approached by some press guys who asked me some salient questions bothering on the fate of the Nigerian youth. Chief amongst them was: "What do you think is the dorminant challenge faced by the average Nigerian youth?"
I didn't need to think much before answering this question. I have always said that the core issue the average Nigerian youth is faced with is LACK OF DIRECTION, KNOWLEDGE OF THE WRONG INFORMATION AND MENTORSHIP BY THE WRONG PERSONS.
This is the foundation of all the problems. What we lack is not just physical infracstructure, but mental infracstructure. We are a generation that is value-deficient. In a normal sane and progressive society, every youth ought to have a belief system he/she can live and equally die for, not just existing to accumulate age. Her youths must do more than mere existing... Her youths value education more than entertainment...

I think there is a very easy way out! I believe every youth in Nigeria connects to some religious belief system of some sort. So, if like we all know, the political class have failed this generation, shouldn't this be the right time for our religious leaders to provide the much needed direction and a selfless shoulder to lean on? Different from what should be, a huge bunch of our religious leaders seem to be socially irresponsible, so much so that they have several warped theologies to back up this unjingoistic attitude. To these ones, they are not socially obligated to society... Their obligation is to their 'God'! Sometimes I wonder, if this would have been the reactions of Jesus Christ [or Mohammed] to the gross mediocrity and moral bankruptcy that strangulates the dreams and hopes of the average Nigerian youth, if they were to live in our contemporary days?

The gross ineptitude and unpathrotic attitude of our religious leaders ought to change! They must do more than just sermonize... With the current shape of things in this country, the average Nigerian youth seems to have no where and no one to run to for help, guidance and assistance. He is left to FACE THE FIGHT, which in most cases, he unavoidablywalks into.

Fact is, at the end of the day, the responsibility for change all comes back to the individual youth. We must decide to be like the crop inside the soil; the crop always fights its way out. No matter the hardness of the soil, every determined crop somehow finds expression. Folks, no determined dreamer ever dies without expression. Determination is the key to expression and fulfilment, especially when you find yourself in a society like ours!

Every Nigerian youth must develop a dream for himself; a dream for his future. In the face of the seemingly ever-increasing challenges, we must choose to see with our minds, not our eyes. We must make a conscious choice to be 'eyely blinded' but 'mindly sighted'. We must make and take responsibility for our lives and choose to be the real pilot of our destinies, trusting God to lead the way, choosing to stand for what is right and shouting down all forms of mediocrity and warped perspectives that seeks to undermine our future and the worth of our present.

There is hope for this country. More than ever, I know there is hope from my generation. Weekly, I move around this country and I meet with outstanding youths, the exceptionally intelligent and purpose-driven ones. Most of them have taken it upon themselves the sole responsiblity of building this country from where they are, the very best way they can... Who dares say there is no hope? There is!This is the best generation ever!

I dare say, certain elements in the failed generation should be wary of the kind of values they try to hand down to us, because henceforth, we are going to test and x-ray them, before accepting any. That is, if at all we will.

We now know we are indeed the pilots of our destinies!

BEING FAKE IS HARDWORK!

I believe the hardest task anyone can saddle him/herself with is working towards being the perfect replica of somebody else. It costs and involves a lot.

Also, anyone who chooses to be like someone else should be ready for constant [and annoying] evaluation; people will continuously measure your 'transformations' with your ORIGINAL's identity. This could be very frustrating if whatever they say is a far cry from what you want to hear. It is cheaper being YOU. It is only a 'competitor' than stands the risk of being defeated...

On the other hand, nobody desires to ‘photocopy’ an ‘original’ that's a failure. Everybody wants to duplicate a SUCCESS. Obviously, pirates don’t go after artistes and albums that don’t sell. Thus, as an ORIGINAL, when you become successful in anything, there would always be someone waiting in the wings to ‘duplicate’ your style, approach and principles. While this may be the shortest route to ‘success’, it equally has its cons.

I can't argue the fact that some folks may have risen to fame and stardom through duplication of 'successes', one fact we shouldn’t downplay is the fact that the Almighty created us to be ORIGINAL - He equally placed in us all the resources required to make this possible. Without doubts, living life different from our Creator’s standard has its own disadvantages... There is a portion of the Holy bible that says: "What shall it profit a man if he gains the whole world and LOSE HIS SOUL...”
In relation to this post, I think the above can be interpreted as saying: “what will it profit a man if he LOSE HIS SOUL (uniqueness, originality, conscience, individuality) in his attempt/desire to gain the pleasures of life!” The message is simple: Be ye ORIGINAL!!!

It is not out of place to be inspired by people. It only becomes tragic when you let their ORIGINALITY expire yours! I believe it is good to adopt the style and principles of others. However, we have the responsibility of developing ours and thereafter blend theirs with it. To my mind, the effect of other people’s uniqueness ought to make you a BETTER person! It shouldn't transform you into what you were never meant to be! You must make a conscious choice not to get lost in other people, especially in this crazy age that forces you to become what you don't have natural ability for!

Every time I get the privilege of speaking at University campuses and to young people, I never fail to tell them: “get inspired by me, don’t get expired because of me.” All too often, young people easily get carried away by the glittering ORIGINALITY of others, without necessarily focusing on how they can harness theirs. Be yourself, so someone else can adore you. You have a life – LIVE it!

When 2 persons are alike, one of them would certainly lose relevance. The 'photocopy' becomes a ‘spare’. Besides, why on earth should anybody buy 2 shirts of same size, same colour and same design?
Maybe one of the main reasons you have been losing fame, money and relevance is because you are the perfect replica of someone 'around.' Take note of 'around'!
Why should people come after you when your style, product and principles doesn't reveal anything UNIQUE? Nothing sells like DIFFERENCE! Today's leading organizations appreciate this fact, this is why they work assiduously on building a U.S.P - Unique Selling Proposition. They devote so much energy and resources in building and projecting their difference.

Fact is, as a PHOTOCOPY; no matter how much you may try, the credits always goes to your ORIGINAL. All attention shifts to your original, despite your sweat.
Question: why should anybody come for you when your ORIGINAL is still very much around and can be gotten very easily

Looking at a perfect example in the bible, Elisha never gained prominence until Elijah was taken away by the Lord.

Folks, it is too expensive and somewhat detrimental to be a PHOTOCOPY (this is different from being a PROTEGE). It takes away more than it brings.

In life, everybody likes variety. In fact, variety is said to be the spice of life. Thus, if you truly want to be a “spice” in life, be UNIQUE! Refuse to opt for 'pseudo' when you can effortless be a great YOU!

Work on your personal brand. Don’t be ashamed to be different. This is where your wealth and relevance is, celebrate it!

Let me end this post by asking you 2 very important questions:

· If we decide to separate your thoughts, style and principles from your friend’s and those you admire, what will you look like?

· Do you truly have a life you can call yours?

DON'T HATE, APPRECIATE!!!

This is a like a follow-up to my earlier post. By the way, I got all your mails and also saw the fantastic comments you guys sent via facebook. Thanks guys.

Today, I want to look at an attitude that is gradually becoming a culture amongst us. In today's Africa, people speak negative of anyone better than them. A poor man believes every rich man is using ‘something’... this readily serves as a comfortable defense for his poverty. Any young lady doing well for herself is assumed to be 'using' her body. Any young man who is well-off is assumed to be into fraud.
Hardly will you find anyone who will effortlessly celebrate anybody who is ahead of him. To my mind, this is one of the foremost reasons we are still backward as a people. Why? We believe there is nobody worth learning from. The effect? This has made success to continually elude us. It is shameful that this mediocre mentality is been handed down my generation!

Fact is, you can’t become what you blackmail. You can never look like what you talk down. You can't learn from someone you are resent; you can only learn from someone you celebrate and respect. What you respect will inevitable come to you. What you do not respect will continually run from you. You attract what you revere.

In my own little finding, one of the reasons why some people are not still rich or up in their game is because they criticize the rich and those well-off than they are.
They just hate rich people! The Holy bible warns against this! In the book of Proverbs, King Solomon advised: “don’t criticize the rich, even in the privacy of your bedroom...”

Respect is poles apart from love. What is the difference? Love is when you find something attractive, while respect means to see something as valuable. Respect is not the same thing as love. That I love you doesn’t mean I respect you... It is the love of money that is the root of evil, not the respect of money. These two mindsets come with an attitude and approach. It is the attitude that always determines the end result.

There are people who are doing what you cannot do. Respect them, and show it! Don’t trivialize or belittle their efforts, eulogize them! The surest route to the ground is to continually criticize those who are up. Nature works with principles. God is a just God. He cannot give you what you openly or secretly criticize. He may not be fair, but He is just! His word says: “do unto others as you would they do unto you...” Here is the revelation: you will reap WHAT you sow, not WHERE you sow! If you appreciate someone’s crown and express it, you are explicitly telling God: “I love the crown; Lord, it won’t be bad on my head too!” It won’t take long, you would attract it. It is not people that give us our recompense, it is God!

Respect people doing what you cannot do. The Holy Bible says: “He that waters shall be watered...” In my own phraseology, this means that HE THAT WATERS WILL DEFINITELY BECOME WORTHY OF WATERING.... It is only a man that genuinely appreciates people that will experience appreciation in all areas of life. This is one fundamental law of success that cannot be broken by time, nature or persons.

Study carefully the lives of those who aren’t making progress in certain areas of their lives, chances are that they are the ones who refuse to applaud those who are ahead of them in their game/field. When they see somebody who is doing extremely well, rather than say: “THE MAN/WOMAN IS DOING VERY WELL, WE NEED TO ENCOURAGE HIM/HER TO CONTINUE...” Their pride won’t let them appreciate someone else's laudable efforts. You would hear comments like: “The Guy/Lady is ‘trying’... There is nothing special about what he/she is doing; it not something I cannot do............... I am just taking my time... Very soon, people will also know the stuff I am made of....”

You cannot resemble what you resent. A great man once said it is only those who respect money that can multiply it. This is deep, let's reflect on it!

I have seen folks who are every time uncomfortable being around individuals who are doing better than they are. They would rather be in the circles of those they are better than; so they can be seen 'stars' by those who they are 'better' than......... This is a defeatist mentality. In Africa, we call this: LOCAL CHAMPION! This is a inferiority complex and poor self esteem. If everybody around you is eating from you, you will soon dry up. Wisdom demands that you at least have someone you are also ‘eating’ from. Every child has a father... every father is [supposes to be] someone’s child!

In addition, that someone isn’t like you doesn’t mean he/she has a problem or is inferior. This belief has ruined many relationships - business and romantic. Over the years, I have noticed that people are not always comfortable with anyone who is different from them. This is wrong! How then can you grow mentally, if everybody around you is like you?

I am reminded of the university experience. Our belief then was that anyone who is studying a course different from ours is in a very easy-to-pass department. We always felt our course of study was superior to others. We were blinded to the reality that everything in life is interlaced. The doctor needs the accountant. The engineer needs the lawyer. The journalist needs the agriculturist.... At that point of our lives, we were blinded to this reality. Our feeling of self-importance clouded our sense of reasoning.

Whoever is not like you is not inferior. They are just who they are – DIFFERENT/UNIQUE! God never created anything useless. If you believe you are not useless, then nobody is. Refuse to think less of another man. Fact is, we don’t really see people as they are. We see them as we are!

It is high time we develop the praise/appreciation culture and dump the hate culture. The easiest and surest way up the ladder is the celebrate those who have succeeded in climbing. Like the bible says: “Seedtime and harvest time will not cease...” If you don’t respect other people’s authority, you will never become an authority!

READING YOUR STORY FROM THE RIGHT LIPS....

Isn't it amazing how we most times go all-out just to win the approval of people? We do everything just to be on the good books of anybody and everybody, even when it is noticeable that some of them don't really give a damn about our person!!!

Over the years, I have discovered that many people lost their fire for life, their fighting spirit, their daring attitudes, their will to be and do --------- merely because of one form of rejection or for the reason that somebody somewhere registered his/her abhorrence and intense dislike for them.

I have always believed that anything good will be hated by anything evil; the best will always be hated by anything average...
On the other hand, people will always criticize what they don’t understand. Besides, it wouldn't be an act of wisdom for anyone to embark on a ‘you-must-love-me’ campaign... Life is too short to permit that luxury! We just have to live our lives the best way we can and trusting God for the grace to be the best person we should be!

I am tempted to believe that Jesus Christ was faced with a similar situation at one point of His journey, hence the remark: “all the people the Father has sent to me must surely come to me....” He was confident destiny had assigned some special people to His life and no matter what, they will surely come to Him and stick with Him. This ought to be our conviction also, we also need to have same perspective if we must enjoy our journey through life!

This is the reality of life: no matter how nice you are, there will still be haters around. While some will hate you for being 'too nice' - they will describe it as 'foolish', others will hate you for being 'too independent' - they will describe it as being 'rigid'.......... There will always be persons who have intense dislike for you merely because of your physical height or body built...... Some hate you for being 'too smart', whereas to others, you are just one dull chap! Some will say you are 'too rich' to be their friend, others will say you are too poor..........................

The truth of the matter is, most of these folks are people who envy/admire you and will do anything possible to be like you. Isn't it a shame that it has become a culture to us Africans to always criticize anyone better than us? This is why to the average man on the street, anybody richer than he is definitely got his money through shady means........ This attitude is what I like to describe as IGNORANCE ON RAMPAGE!

While it is important to sometimes hear/listen to what people think about you, don’t ever make the mistake of asking/listening to anyone who doesn’t have any ‘investment’ in your life to tell you your 'story'. You will never get the truth from their lips!
Imagine asking the devil to give you God’s resume? Everything you will hear from him will be lies and proof of his hatred/jealousy!
You will never get the true picture of your life from the lips of those who have not invested anything in you!

At another point of Jesus’ journey, He needed to know what people thought about Him, so He asked His folks: “What does the public think of me...?” He got some responses. But, as if to prove that what the ‘crowd’ think doesn’t matter much, He didn’t emphasize on what He was told their perspectives were. Rather, He went further to ask those who had invested their time, sweat and resources on Him: “who do you think I am....?” These were the comments He eventually held dear to His heart!

Don’t try reading your story from the lips of those who don’t like you; they've made no deposits in you, so they won’t speak right about you!
Refuse to fake just to win admiration from people; you are not a failure because some loser somewhere said so! Stay true to who you are and you will attract genuinely nice people.

You must happen!

WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?

Self-imagery [HOW YOU SEE YOURSELF] matters a lot in the equation of success. There is no way you can be successful if you see yourself as ‘not-good-enough’ or a ‘never-do-well’. Our perceptions of life are what attract the circumstances of life to us... “AS A MAN THINKS IN HIS HEART, SO HE [and situations] SHALL BE...” This implies that Nigeria will NEVER be productive for those who think she is cursed!

From experience, I have discovered that over 88% of individuals in our generation suffer an esteem problem. Their lives have been wrongly shaped by the situations, suggestions and opinions of other people. In many cases, the opinions were intended to be a joke. But somehow, it had a negative effect on the person it was used on... Whatever goes into the mind must someday cry for expression.

Dear friends, the people around you are the ones who paint the picture you will have about yourself. This is why it very important you consciously hang around people who believe in you and who use good words on you. We are all made by words, what we hear and believe shapes us.... What we hear is what decides how we see ourselves...

The way you see yourself is what decides what you pursue. Your self-imagery affects your goals and dreams... This is why how you see yourself is as, if not more, important than how you see God. Ask the 12 spies and the 2 leprous men in the bible...

God never created an error. He never created a failure. Every man has a star, what matters is just SEASON. When Jesus Christ was born, it was His star that attracted the 3 wise men... Even Jabez had a STAR; he later became the one that saved his city...
Just as you have a unique STAR, you also have a SEASON. Make a conscious choice not to faint before your SEASON shows up. When your SEASON dawns, your success will be uncontrollable, uncontainable, overwhelming....

Against all odds, make it a deliberate decision to always see yourself in positive light as a great person and to always say good things about life and your Creator... Never create or allow room for regrets.

I am very confident that “THE-NEXT-BIG-THING-TO-HAPPEN” just read this piece.
You will succeed!