This is a like a follow-up to my earlier post. By the way, I got all your mails and also saw the fantastic comments you guys sent via facebook. Thanks guys.Today, I want to look at an attitude that is gradually becoming a culture amongst us. In today's Africa, people speak negative of anyone better than them. A poor man believes every rich man is using ‘something’... this readily serves as a comfortable defense for his poverty. Any young lady doing well for herself is assumed to be 'using' her body. Any young man who is well-off is assumed to be into fraud.
Hardly will you find anyone who will effortlessly celebrate anybody who is ahead of him. To my mind, this is one of the foremost reasons we are still backward as a people. Why? We believe there is nobody worth learning from. The effect? This has made success to continually elude us. It is shameful that this mediocre mentality is been handed down my generation!
Fact is, you can’t become what you blackmail. You can never look like what you talk down. You can't learn from someone you are resent; you can only learn from someone you celebrate and respect. What you respect will inevitable come to you. What you do not respect will continually run from you. You attract what you revere.
In my own little finding, one of the reasons why some people are not still rich or up in their game is because they criticize the rich and those well-off than they are.
They just hate rich people! The Holy bible warns against this! In the book of Proverbs, King Solomon advised: “don’t criticize the rich, even in the privacy of your bedroom...”
Respect is poles apart from love. What is the difference? Love is when you find something attractive, while respect means to see something as valuable. Respect is not the same thing as love. That I love you doesn’t mean I respect you... It is the love of money that is the root of evil, not the respect of money. These two mindsets come with an attitude and approach. It is the attitude that always determines the end result.
There are people who are doing what you cannot do. Respect them, and show it! Don’t trivialize or belittle their efforts, eulogize them! The surest route to the ground is to continually criticize those who are up. Nature works with principles. God is a just God. He cannot give you what you openly or secretly criticize. He may not be fair, but He is just! His word says: “do unto others as you would they do unto you...” Here is the revelation: you will reap WHAT you sow, not WHERE you sow! If you appreciate someone’s crown and express it, you are explicitly telling God: “I love the crown; Lord, it won’t be bad on my head too!” It won’t take long, you would attract it. It is not people that give us our recompense, it is God!
Respect people doing what you cannot do. The Holy Bible says: “He that waters shall be watered...” In my own phraseology, this means that HE THAT WATERS WILL DEFINITELY BECOME WORTHY OF WATERING.... It is only a man that genuinely appreciates people that will experience appreciation in all areas of life. This is one fundamental law of success that cannot be broken by time, nature or persons.
Study carefully the lives of those who aren’t making progress in certain areas of their lives, chances are that they are the ones who refuse to applaud those who are ahead of them in their game/field. When they see somebody who is doing extremely well, rather than say: “THE MAN/WOMAN IS DOING VERY WELL, WE NEED TO ENCOURAGE HIM/HER TO CONTINUE...” Their pride won’t let them appreciate someone else's laudable efforts. You would hear comments like: “The Guy/Lady is ‘trying’... There is nothing special about what he/she is doing; it not something I cannot do............... I am just taking my time... Very soon, people will also know the stuff I am made of....”
You cannot resemble what you resent. A great man once said it is only those who respect money that can multiply it. This is deep, let's reflect on it!
I have seen folks who are every time uncomfortable being around individuals who are doing better than they are. They would rather be in the circles of those they are better than; so they can be seen 'stars' by those who they are 'better' than......... This is a defeatist mentality. In Africa, we call this: LOCAL CHAMPION! This is a inferiority complex and poor self esteem. If everybody around you is eating from you, you will soon dry up. Wisdom demands that you at least have someone you are also ‘eating’ from. Every child has a father... every father is [supposes to be] someone’s child!
In addition, that someone isn’t like you doesn’t mean he/she has a problem or is inferior. This belief has ruined many relationships - business and romantic. Over the years, I have noticed that people are not always comfortable with anyone who is different from them. This is wrong! How then can you grow mentally, if everybody around you is like you?
I am reminded of the university experience. Our belief then was that anyone who is studying a course different from ours is in a very easy-to-pass department. We always felt our course of study was superior to others. We were blinded to the reality that everything in life is interlaced. The doctor needs the accountant. The engineer needs the lawyer. The journalist needs the agriculturist.... At that point of our lives, we were blinded to this reality. Our feeling of self-importance clouded our sense of reasoning.
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